A Silent Sufferer
A friend of mine related to me a story about a male lecturer in her university, who is of a foreign nationality. He would always insist on her seeing him in his office alone, whenever she wishes to obtain copies of lecture notes or marked scripts.
Once inside with the door closed, he would sit very closely beside her and rub her on her back and arms as he talks. She is greatly uncomfortable with this and has informed him so, but he just smiled it off. On occasions, this lecturer has complimented her for being "pretty" and "sexy". He would also ask her to translate his letters and type out students' marks -- any excuse to keep her in his room.
This has gone on for three months, and she is worried that something "more" might happen to her.
No undergraduate should have to go through such trauma.
To complicate matters, the same lecturer will teach her again in the next semester. If this issue is not handled with the right discretion, she will, in her own words, "surely suffer for another year". She is also aware that it is difficult to gather evidence to support her claims.
What would you advise my friend to do?
[Edit] Special thanks to Twisted Heels. You gave a simple solution, yet practical -- by eliminating the root cause. Thanks to all jammers who commented. Comments are now closed.
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9 comments:
Which school? I think if it were to happen in my place we would have known about it and we'll definitely do something about it. Did she tell her coursemates or just you? Perhaps they can help her think of something. Cook up a plan to catch him in action but i don't know if that's what she wants.
Ask one of her classmates to accompany her, because 'both' need class notes?
If the lecturer asks her to stay, ask her friend to stay also. If he insists of her being alone, then ask him for the reason.
I am sure she can report the matter confidentially. No names should be exposed when whistleblowing. Btw, who knows if she is not the only one?
Such behaviour should NEVER EVER be left in silence. Your friend has to be strong. No one should take advantage of her.
should really ask someone to accompany her lo like 'twisted heel' said! insist n ask why must she be alone? or use hidden camera?
btw,i just tagged u!
yo! come let's rock n roll...
Advice would be to lodge a report. Make it public, if there were other vistims they may come forward as well.
Personally, after the first incident, I would have no reason whatsoever to let it repeat i.e no reason to go to his office alone for lecture notes. And like mentioned by someone, get a friend if there is an absolute must to walk into the den of a sexual harasser.
ambik gunting pegi...seduce dia sikit kemudian gunting sama dia!
hehehe...report sama polis la.
(sexual) harrassment of any form will not be tolerated in any organization.
get your friend to speak to a trustworthy counsellor - it can be anyone of a higher authority, someone she finds she can trust and confide in. her identity should not be disclosed but the case oughtta be made public.
Thanks to all jammers who commented. I actually advised my friend similar to Nalini. However, this raises several issues, like who to report to, report confidentiality and whether any action will be taken, given the lack of evidence and witnesses.
Hence, I believe the best advice is as Twisted Heels says. A simple solution, yet practical -- By eliminating the root cause.
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